Attack Monkeys With Herpes Are Jumping From Florida Trees
Well, we knew it would end sooner or later. There had to be a final chapter in the story of Florida…that one tale of insanity so intense that it could…
The monkeys dove from the trees and splashed into the water just ahead of the boat.
(Photo by Warren Little/Getty Images)Well, we knew it would end sooner or later. There had to be a final chapter in the story of Florida...that one tale of insanity so intense that it could never be topped...and this is it. It seems there's a gang of herpes-infested monkeys that's been acting out in Silver River, as evidenced by the video below. We've seen some crazy ish here in our delightfully tilted Florida. Alligators make appearances on Ring doorbells. Snowbirds drive the wrong way while napping. Frozen Iguanas fall from the trees every winter. Even monkeys have taken to turf wars in the trees. Our story begins with a small boat filled with a wide-eyed family on a weekend adventure. As their vessel approached a clump of trees along their cruise route, the tourists noticed something moving in the branches above them. Suddenly, large projectiles began to plummet into the water ahead of them. What the heck was happening?
Flying out of the trees and splashing loudly into the water ahead, wild monkeys were acting like damned fools! Dozens of the critters dove from the trees and splashed loudly in what was later identified as a turf war between groups of rhesus macaques. The behavior was met with varying reactions from the family of boaters. As one child screamed for his father to turn around, the father laughed and kept recording. The crazy part? The man who recorded the video says it's not the first time he's seen the monkeys behaving in such a way, saying turf wars have broken out between warring groups before.
Researchers say they'd like to decrease or eliminate the rhesus monkey population in the park and they have a good reason to do so. Turns out, some of the monkeys carry herpes. Now, I'm not gonna get all judgey and call them trampy or snything, but i will say it's not good to have monkeys with herpes around. To this point, 50 humans have contracted herpes from the ho-bags due to being scratched or bitten. However, there have been NO cases of herpes being contracted from monkeys in Florida. It's surprising really, considering that Florida tourists like to feed the monkeys or take selfies with them. That's how you get herpes from a monkey right there. The rhesus macaque monkey is originally from Asia. They've also been known to severely decimate bird populations wherever the monkeys thrive. They are generally very calm around tourists, understanding that a tourist means free food. Source: Fox13News.com
Let's Be Careful Out There
Rock Stars Who Banked In 2022
Top 20 Highest-Grossing Rock Tours of 2022
The tour industry bounced back significantly in 2022 following a shutdown of nearly 18 months due to the coronavirus pandemic.
Billboard has an extensive breakdown of nearly every fact and figure related to touring in 2022. The biggest ranking of them all is the top 100 list of the highest-grossing tours of the year. While rapper Bad Bunny topped the list grossing over $373 million, many of rock's biggest names weren't far behind. In fact, five rock artists made up the top 10 highest-grossing tours of 2022.
So, which artists are likely swimming in tour revenue cash Scrooge McDuck-style? Scroll below to see the top 20 artists that grossed the most money on the road in 2022.
Machine Gun Kelly
Jason Koerner/Getty ImagesFORT LAUDERDALE, FLORIDA - DECEMBER 04: Machine Gun Kelly performs on stage during Audacy Beach Festival at Fort Lauderdale Beach on December 04, 2022 in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. (Photo by Jason Koerner/Getty Images for Audacy )
Metallica
Theo Wargo/Getty ImagesNEW YORK, NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 24: Lars Ulrich and James Hetfield of Metallica perform onstage during Global Citizen Festival 2022: New York at Central Park on September 24, 2022 in New York City. (Photo by Theo Wargo/Getty Images for Global Citizen)
Dead & Company
Theo Wargo/Getty ImagesNEW YORK, NY - OCTOBER 31: John Mayer, Bill Kreutzman and Bob Weir of Dead & Company In Concert at Madison Square Garden on October 31, 2015 in New York City. (Photo by Theo Wargo/Getty Images)
Trans-Siberian Orchestra
Anna Webber/Getty ImagesNEW YORK, NY - NOVEMBER 17: Chris Caffery, Roddy Chong, David Z, Joel Hoekstra and members of Trans-Siberian Orchestra perform onstage during an exclusive performance at The iHeartRadio Theater in New York at iHeartRadio Theater on November 17, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by Anna Webber/Getty Images for iHeart Radio)
Dave Matthews Band
Terry Wyatt/Getty ImagesFRANKLIN, TENNESSEE - SEPTEMBER 26: Dave Matthews of Dave Matthews Band performs onstage during day two of the 2021 Pilgrimage Music & Cultural Festival on September 26, 2021 in Franklin, Tennessee. (Photo by Terry Wyatt/Getty Images for Pilgrimage Music & Cultural Festival)
Billy Joel
Ethan Miller/Getty ImagesLAS VEGAS, NEVADA - FEBRUARY 26: Recording artist Billy Joel performs at Allegiant Stadium on February 26, 2022 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images)
Phish
Mike Lawrie/Getty ImagesNEWPORT, RHODE ISLAND - JULY 28: Trey Anastasio performs during the "If I Had A Song" tribute set during day three of the 2019 Newport Folk Festival at Fort Adams State Park on July 28, 2019 in Newport, Rhode Island. (Photo by Mike Lawrie/Getty Images)
Roger Waters
Kevin Winter/Getty ImagesLOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - SEPTEMBER 27: Roger Waters performs onstage at Crypto.com Arena on September 27, 2022 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)
Iron Maiden
Maria IvesGenesis
Timothy Hiatt/Getty ImagesCHICAGO, ILLINOIS - NOVEMBER 15: Phil Collins of Genesis performs on the opening night of their North American "The Last Domino?" tour at the United Center on November 15, 2021 in Chicago, Illinois. (Photo by Timothy Hiatt/Getty Images)
Imagine Dragons
Kevin Winter/Getty ImagesLOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - NOVEMBER 20: (EDITORIAL USE ONLY) Dan Reynolds of Imagine Dragons performs onstage during the 2022 American Music Awards at Microsoft Theater on November 20, 2022 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)
My Chemical Romance
Ethan Miller/Getty ImagesLAS VEGAS, NV - OCTOBER 07: My Chemical Romance singer Gerard Way performs at the Red Rock Casino October 7, 2011 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images)
Guns N' Roses
Amy Sussman/Getty ImagesINDIO, CALIFORNIA - APRIL 30: Axl Rose of Guns N' Roses performs onstage with Carrie Underwood during Day 2 of the 2022 Stagecoach Festival at the Empire Polo Field on April 30, 2022 in Indio, California. (Photo by Amy Sussman/Getty Images for Stagecoach)
The Eagles
Ethan Miller/Getty ImagesLAS VEGAS, NEVADA - SEPTEMBER 27: Don Henley of the Eagles performs at MGM Grand Garden Arena on September 27, 2019 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images)
Paul McCartney
Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty ImagesCLEVELAND, OHIO - OCTOBER 30: Paul McCartney speaks onstage during the 36th Annual Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame Induction Ceremony at Rocket Mortgage Fieldhouse on October 30, 2021 in Cleveland, Ohio. (Photo by Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images for The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame )
Def Leppard & Motley Crue
Emma McIntyre/Getty ImagesLOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - DECEMBER 04: (L-R) Rick Allen, Tommy Lee, Vivian Campbell, Joe Elliott, Bret Michaels, Phil Collen, Rick Savage, Rikki Rockett, C.C. DeVille, Nikki Sixx, Vince Neil, Mick Mars, and Bobby Dall speak during the press conference for THE STADIUM TOUR DEF LEPPARD - MOTLEY CRUE - POISON at SiriusXM Studios on December 04, 2019 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Emma McIntyre/Getty Images for SiriusXM)
Red Hot Chili Peppers
Michael Loccisano/Getty ImagesEAST RUTHERFORD, NEW JERSEY - AUGUST 17: Anthony Kiedis of the Red Hot Chili Peppers performs at MetLife Stadium on August 17, 2022 in East Rutherford, New Jersey. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images)
The Rolling Stones
Ethan Miller/Getty ImagesLAS VEGAS, NEVADA - NOVEMBER 06: Singer Mick Jagger of The Rolling Stones performs during a stop of the band's No Filter tour at Allegiant Stadium on November 6, 2021 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images)
Coldplay
Buda Mendes/Getty ImagesRIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - SEPTEMBER 10: Chris Martin of the band Coldplay performs at the Mundo Stage during the Rock in Rio Festival at Cidade do Rock on September 10, 2022 in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. The famous festival Rock in Rio returns after two years of cancellation due to COVID-19 pandemic. (Photo by Buda Mendes/Getty Images)
Elton John
Scott Dudelson/Getty ImagesLOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - NOVEMBER 17: Musician Sir Elton John performs onstage during the Farewell Yellow Brick Road tour at Dodger Stadium on November 17, 2022 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Scott Dudelson/Getty Images)
Monkeys out here contracting herpes...
