Intruder Alert: Florida Maintenance Man Crawls into Sleeping Victim’s Bed
Who knew a Florida maintenance man could turn into a mischievous bedroom invader? Well, meet Wallace Miller, a 64-year-old Panama City resident with a penchant for unwelcome slumber parties.
According to WFLA, last Tuesday, while most folks were peacefully dreaming away, Miller decided to embark on an unsolicited late-night adventure. He casually strolled into someone’s home and, for reasons known only to him, crawled into bed with an unsuspecting victim. How strange? He just climbed under the covers with her while she was in the land of slumber.
So, who was this mysterious midnight marauder? Panama City Police identified him as none other than Wallace Miller, a registered sexual predator. Not exactly the kind of neighbor you’d want to invite over for a sleepover.
Maintenance Man Mayhem:
Now Miller wasn’t some random stranger who happened to wander into the wrong home. He worked as a maintenance man in the very apartment complex where the victim lived! You’d think he’d have better things to do at that hour than playing Goldilocks in other people’s beds.
When our sleeping beauty woke up to find Miller cuddled up next to her, she didn’t just roll over and go back to sleep. She recognized him and decided to take matters into her own hands… More accurately, her fists. She bravely tried to fend off this uninvited cuddle buddy, causing Miller to scramble and make a run for it. No cozy breakfast in bed for this guy!
The consequences? Well, Miller didn’t exactly get a gold star for his late night surprise. The Panama City Police slapped him with charges of burglary with battery, and he’s now taking an unscheduled nap in the Bay County Jail. Sweet dreams, Wallace! Hope you find your own bed there!
5 of the Craziest Cringeworthy Crimes Ever Committed
While committing crimes may seem black and white (you either broke the law or you didn’t), there are certainly some crimes that are dumber than others. Sometimes it’s the crime itself that’s wild, other times, it’s the people committing said crimes. These are 5 of the craziest, cringeworthy crimes ever committed.
Crimes can happen anywhere, anytime, to anyone. However, it takes a very unique individual, a case study if you will, to commit some of these outrageously dumb crimes. Years ago, these criminals would have been featured on Spike TV or one of those America’s Dumbest Criminal shows. Today, I’m not sure if those shows are around…and I’m certain Spike TV isn’t around anymore. That’s a story for another time.
Someone being arrested. (Photo by Michael M. Santiago/Getty Images)
Craziest Crimes
Crimes can happen for a number of reasons. They may happen out of necessity. They could also happen on accident. These crimes, however, do not fall into those categories. These crimes are different. None of these would accidentally happen. They also aren’t a matter of life or death. There’s no ethics quiz here, or any matters of ‘would you steal bread to support your family?’ These crimes, and criminals, aren’t straight up cringeworthy.
While all of these crimes are crazy and certainly cringeworthy, they also make for excellent conversation pieces. That’s why I’ve gone and found five examples of the wildest stories that Dave and Chuck the Freak have talked about and made a list highlighting the best of the best. Let’s be honest…what’s better than reading a story about one of the craziest crimes ever committed? Or, watching Dave and Chuck the Freak talk about some of the dumbest crimes ever committed? Personally, I’m going with the funny storytellers.
They add their own two cents and perspectives on these stories that nobody else could provide. Not even those talking heads on the dumbest criminal shows. Am I the only one who remembers those? I feel like they were a staple on TruTV or VH1, but now all I can find on TruTV is Impractical Jokers, which is awesome but…you get it. Let’s not delay! Here’s the list!
5 of the Dumbest Crimes Ever Committed
