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Stan and Haney

Afternoons 2pm-6pm

You would think that a 30-year-old man would have learned by now that 911 is for emergencies only.

Well, 30-year-old Brett Mitchell Williams of Naples, Fl,  has yet to learn this lesson.

The Collier County Sheriff’s Office received several phone calls from his cell phone number. In one of these calls, he claimed to be someone named Mark and told officers that someone was smoking marijuana before he hung up.

The phone that Williams was using was in his name, so finding his address was pretty simple.

When deputies arrived, his father answered the door and told them that he went to the gas station for a pack of smokes.

So in an attempt to locate Williams, they gave him a callback. Each time they reached him he made use of the ever-beautiful F word. Saying things like, “what the f*** do you want?” and “f*** off.”

He even peppered in my favorite line before hanging up. “f*** you, you will never find me and I am not going to jail,”

They arrested him at the gas station and took him to jail.

Do you think he learned his lesson now?




Junior is the producer of the Stan and Haney show. He's a sucker for gelato and watching Hulu shows. When he's not working, he's probably exercising excessively, reading endless books, or taking long walks on the dog beach by himself. Because why not?