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Stan and Haney

Afternoons 2pm-6pm

A proud male turkey struts his stuff.

The Wedgewood Manor neighborhood in Zephyrhills, Fl, has been experiencing nothing but terror. Terror from the horrible, the ruthless, the relentless… Turkey?

That’s right. Wild turkeys are chasing, clawing, pecking, and knocking down Seniors in this community.

81-year-old Jerry Danford had to get hip surgery after two males attacked him and knocked him over, slashing him with their talons. He told The Palm Beach Post, “It was a coordinated attack. One would fly at me and when I was fighting that one off, the other one would come at me.”

The vice president of the homeowners association, Bob Dunkle, said, “He was laying there 10 minutes or so before someone found him. Turkeys can be scary and some of the people here are in their 90s. Having a turkey run up to you when you are getting out of your car is frightening.”

An FWC report said, “Residents recounted turkeys in front yards prohibiting people from exiting dwellings, residents having to run to cars or into homes as turkeys approached, turkeys chasing vehicles and golf carts and attacking cars. A Chihuahua on a nearby street is said to be the only thing the turkeys fear and when he runs after them, turkeys leave the area.”

The FWC recommends “hazing” the turkeys, and no that doesn’t mean that they are joining a frat. What they mean by that is chasing the turkeys, waving your arms, clapping your hands, spraying with a “strong water jet from a hose,” and opening a large umbrella while facing them.

So it seems like it is time that these seniors get their war boots on and fight back to regain their community.





Junior is the producer of the Stan and Haney show. He's a sucker for gelato and watching Hulu shows. When he's not working, he's probably exercising excessively, reading endless books, or taking long walks on the dog beach by himself. Because why not?