Step 1: Dress appropriately. Throw on something you won’t mind having to toss in the laundry or just toss all together if/when it ends up soaked in sangria.
Step 2: Eat something. Today is not the day to be all like, “Oh, I’ll just have an iced black coffee and half a grape for breakfast.” This is your “Hunger Games.” You need to carbo load or else you’ll never make it out alive.
Step 3: Buddy up. Don’t pull a Beyoncé circa 2003 and go solo. A party partner will help you stay motivated, stay drunk, and stay in one piece (and if this drinking is beachside, in your one-piece, too). Plus, you’ll need someone to help you decide which filter to throw on your fifth selfie of the day, even if it’s only 3 p.m.
Step 4: Charge your phone. The last thing you need is to reach 5 p.m., be ready to make a move, and realize you’re at 2 percent and that no one else knows Jon From Tinder or has his number to see where he and his buddies are raging.
Step 5: Eat again. Oooooooh, nachos!
Step 6: Hold off as long as you can on shots. They are so hard to resist, and like that slut Shannon, they go down really easily. Trust us when we say that your best move is to pace yourself with hard liquor. Remember this rule when it comes to shots: Sun is up, pour just beer in your cup; sun has set, throw back some Fireball and make out with that dude (yeah, we know, it doesn’t rhyme, but it’s a solid rule).